November 9, 2009

The Strictly Sweep – Week 8

And woosh!! That was Blackpool. Fitting wasn’t it that the home of ballroom dancing got a perfect dance, with Ali & Brian’s 40/40 for the Viennese Waltz, together with a 35 for Ricky W & Natalie’s Tango. You can clearly see that we’re approaching the business end of the competition now, with six out of the nine performances scoring 30 or more. You can also see that the public now seem to have taken on board that what they’re watching, while entertainment true, is also a competition, and that competitions should be judged on skill. So, we had in the bottom two what were, with no doubt, the poorest performances of the night, with Craig & Flavia against Ricky G & Erin. The “Get Craig to Blackpool” campaign wassuccessful, they got him there, but now though is the time to get serious – seriously, Craig, for all his effort and endeavour, was a weak dancer, and there was little surprise when it came to the judge’s verdict. So, alas, if you had Craig & Flavia in the sweep, that’s it for you.

As regards the leagues, a perfect score means huge points, and thus Ali & Brian have surged 11 points clear at the top of the main league table ahead of Ricky W & Natalie, with a further 11 points to Jade & Ian in third. However, Ricky W & Natalie’s 35 for their Tango has seen them knock Laila & Anton off the top of the Ballroom league for the first time in six weeks and surge ahead, with Ali & Brian’s perfect score also seeing them leapfrog the long time leaders. As for the Latin league, it remains as you were for the top three – the two remaining couples both performed ballroom this week, and so remain first and third, seperated by Zoe & James.

The minor competitions have had a shake up, with Ali & Brian now ahead in the highest weekly score competition with their 40, and in the number of tens competition with a total of 5 to Ricky W & Natalie’s 4. However, Ricky W & Natalie remain clear in the average score competition, although the gap to Ali & Brian has dropped to 1.37 points.

We’re back to the old homestead in Shepherd’s Bush next week, after the glamour of the Tower Ballroom. But, like I’ve said, we’re now really in the business stage of the competition. All we have left now are the real contenders and the dark horses. The excitement leading up to the final starts from here. Not to mention the high standard of ethical judging, unlike certain other television shows.

As Team Cola, aka The Dancing Hobbits, might say…”YEAH BABY!!!”

Dancers Points
Ali/Brian 533
Ricky/Natalie 522
Jade/Ian 511
Chris/Ola 460
Laila/Anton 453
Zoe/James 452
Phil/Katya 448
Natalie/Vincent 446
Ricky/Erin 418
Craig/Flavia 400
Jo/Brendan 293
Lynda/Darren 261
Joe/Kristina 199
Rav/Aliona 182
Martina/Matthew 150
Richard/Lilia 150

For the ballroom and latin leagues, the tables look like this:
Celebrations Ballroom League

Ricky/Natalie 163
Ali/Brian 154
Laila/Anton 152
Jade/Ian 146
Natalie/Vincent 136
Phil/Katya 130
Chris/Ola 121
Craig/Flavia 116
Ricky/Erin 103
Zoe/James 101
Jo/Brendan 81
Lynda/Darren 60
Rav/Aliona 54
Joe/Kristina 51
Martina/Matthew 37
Richard/Lilia 34

Roses Latin League

Ricky/Natalie 146
Zoe/James 145
Ali/Brian 139
Ricky/Erin 134
Jade/Ian 131
Natalie/Vincent 123
Phil/Katya 119
Laila/Anton 110
Chris/Ola 97
Craig/Flavia 92
Lynda/Darren 73
Jo/Brendan 72
Joe/Kristina 71
Martina/Matthew 69
Rav/Aliona 62
Richard/Lilia 44

November 6, 2009

Midweek update

Interesting week last week wasn’t it? Yet again the public provoked ire in the judges with their choice of who stayed and who should go, and they chose Ali & Brian and Zoe & James in the bottom two. Head Judge Len said this week that, after Ali & Brian mucked up their Paso in the dance off, he was of the opinion that all Zoe & James needed to do was get through their Samba cleanly and they’d go through. They didn’t, and so the judges were left with a 50/50 choice (which both Judge Craig and Head Judge Len admitted). They chose Ali, and that was that.

All the colours of the rainbow
Ali has said that her injured foot has turned “all the colours of the rainbow”. You will remember that she hurt her foot in training for the Paso Doble, but managed to get through the initial performance ok, and get a decent score. Then of course she had to do it again in the dance off, and was in so much pain that she abandoned her heels and did it in a pair of ballet pumps.

“I did become a complete bag of nerves. I was terrified and just thought, ‘Oh no, I can’t dance on the foot again’. I was in a lot of pain every time I stepped on it. I thought it was over, I really did.”

Fortunately, this week she and Brian are doing the Viennese Waltz, a much more low impact dance that should put less pressure on her foot. The fact that the bruises are all coming out is also a good thing, showing the injury is healing nicely.

Giving both barrels
There’s been no mincing of words from Craig & Flavia this week, who have complained that Strictly is not a proper dance competition. They’ve said that the couples aren’t being judged on their dancing, because the back and forth of criticism makes for “good telly”. Flavia’s main gripe is the lack of experience on the panel in terms of competitive dancing;

“We haven’t got a ballroom and Latin adjudicating panel so you can’t take [the judging] seriously. Len has a Ballroom and Latin background but the others are from stage or commercial dancing.”

She has also complained about the lack of consistency of the comments that the judges have made. Craig, ever the optimist, believes that he needs to get Judge Bruno back on side. I think that may be something of a false hope.
‘Strictly’s not a proper dance contest’

Lo, the Son of the Manse speaks
If ever there was a case of choosing Strictly over rivals on the other side, surely this was it. The Prime Minister prefers The X Factor to Strictly Come Dancing and believes Simon Cowell deserves his millions.

“Cowell accused me of wavering in my support for The X Factor, but I haven’t. I’m an X Factor fan, and Peter Mandelson looks after Strictly Come Dancing.”

Frankly, I’m amazed he could come to such a decision, given that it took him twenty-four hours to decide what his favourite biscuit was. Let us see how many viewers X-Factor loses when this becomes public knowledge!!! :P

“Gordon Brown left to pick up the crumbs in biscuit fiasco”
“Gordon Brown: I prefer X Factor to Strictly Come Dancing”

Strictly’s number one fan…of shoes
Obviously, Brucie and Tess are the upfront faces of Strictly, presenting the main show live every Saturday. But, we shouldn’t also forget Strictly’s presence live at 6.30pm on BBC2 every weekday, It Takes Two, with the limitless ball of energy that is Claudia Winkleman. In fact, Claudia has something in common with one of you, in that she has an inordinate love of shoes. Personally, I’ve never seen the appeal – you buy a pair of shoes, you wear the shoes, and when they wear out, you get another pair of shoes. But, some people seem to go nutsy over them. Case in point, from Claudia;

My eyes become alive at the sight of a good shoe…I love Christian Louboutin to the point where I once found myself outside the shop almost licking the window. His shoes have a great sense of humour and they’re sexy as hell.

Ironically, for a show about dancing, Claudia knows next to nothing about it! Especially hilarious are her attempts to try it herself on “Len’s Masterclass” each Thursday, when Head Judge Len comes in and tries to teach her a move or two from a specific dance, oftentimes in the most inappropriate pair of shoes imaginable.

Claudia Winkleman

Classic Strictly
On Len’s Masterclass this week, Head Judge Len tried to show Claudia a brief part of a Foxtrot, specifically the one performed by Lisa Snowdon and Brendan Cole, one of those rarities that got a perfect score. Lisa & Brendan were part of that tremendous three horse race last year for the title against Tom & Camilla and Rachel & Vincent. Indeed, by the end of the competition, Lisa had improved so much that for her last three dances (Quickstep in the semi-final, Foxtrot and Cha Cha in the final), they got three consecutive maximum scores. Head Judge Len said that she was the best female celebrity not to win the title. So, from last year’s final, Lisa & Brendan’s perfect Foxtrot.

November 2, 2009

The Strictly Sweep – Week 7

See? Who needs X-Factor!!?? The sight of the judges after the bottom two was announced should be enough to get people watching Strictly!! They were almost in the pose of the Three wise monkeys, with Judge Alesha looking like she was going to throw up. Suffice it to say that they weren’t best pleased with the outcome of the public vote, which has seen the “Get Craig to Blackpool” campaign victorious, even in spite of his obvious shortcomings as a dancer. We had an almost perfect score for Ricky W & Natalie’s Quickstep (with only Judge Craig not getting his big one out), together with good scores for Laila & Anton, Jade & Ian, Ali & Brian and Zoe & James. But, as Tess always says, the judge’s score forms only half the overall mark, and they need the public vote. And in this case, the public vote did not go with Ali & Brian or Zoe & James, who were forced into the dance off. And so, they went again, with Ali forced to do the Paso Doble this time in flat shoes owing to her foot injury, and led to the judges making their displeasure known (well, three of them at least):

Judge Craig “Well what a heinous dilemma.”
Judge Bruno “They shouldn’t be there either of them, it’s ridiculous because whoever we are going to save, it’s not fair for the other person.”
Head Judge Len “I’m sorry I know the viewers can do what they like and it’s a popularity contest and all that, this is ludicrous, it’s nonsensical that either of these are in the bottom two!”

And so it was, by a margin of 3-1, that the judges saved Ali & Brian, with only Judge Alesha plumping arbitrarily for Zoe & James because she couldn’t decide. Thus, I’m afraid, if you had Zoe & James in the sweep, that’s it. But direct your ire at the voting public.

As for the leagues, normal service has resumed after last week, with Ricky W & Natalie returning to the top of the main table ahead of Jade & Ian by seven points, with Ali & Brian a further two points back. These three have been exceptionally consistent this year, and are pulling well clear of the chasing pack, although none of them seems to be able to make a break for it; we had Ricky W & Natalie muck it up last week, allowing Ali & Brian to get the big score, while the reverse happened this week. All the while, Jade & Ian get on with it quietly, rack up the scores and stay in contention. In the ballroom league, Laila & Anton’s Viennese Waltz has kept them at the top of the table for the fifth week running, with Jade & Ian jumping into second thanks to their Foxtrot, while Phil & Katya are up to third. The latin league has taken on the appearence of something more than a one horse race again, thanks to Ricky W & Natalie not doing a latin number this week. As a consequence, Zoe & James have closed the gap to a single point, while Ali & Brian are a further six points back in third.

In the minor competitions, Ricky W & Natalie’s huge score of 39 is now the highest score of the series so far, and has caused their average to go up to 34.14, a massive 2.28 points ahead of Ali & Brian, while the three tens they got has pushed their total to 4, with Ali & Brian the only other couple having one to their name.

Blackpool next week, the Tower Ballroom, the Wembley/Lord’s/Twickenham of ballroom dancing. Most of the couples are swapping disciplines; one will be doing another ballroom and one another latin. We’ll see if being in his home town will improve Craig’s footwork, and we’ll see if the public start to treat it like a dance competition again. Although, knowing the public, I wouldn’t bet the house on it. If they vote for a pair of tone-deaf twins, they’ll vote for anybody.

Keep Dancing!!!

Dancers Points
Ricky/Natalie 453
Jade/Ian 446
Ali/Brian 444
Zoe/James 417
Laila/Anton 393
Phil/Katya 391
Natalie/Vincent 384
Chris/Ola 373
Ricky/Erin 366
Craig/Flavia 337
Jo/Brendan 283
Lynda/Darren 231
Joe/Kristina 194
Rav/Aliona 172
Martina/Matthew 135
Richard/Lilia 130

For the ballroom and latin leagues, the tables look like this:
Celebrations Ballroom League

Laila/Anton 147
Jade/Ian 141
Phil/Katya 125
Ricky/Natalie 123
Craig/Flavia 111
Ali/Brian 109
Zoe/James 101
Natalie/Vincent 100
Ricky/Erin 98
Chris/Ola 82
Jo/Brendan 76
Lynda/Darren 55
Rav/Aliona 49
Joe/Kristina 46
Martina/Matthew 32
Richard/Lilia 29

Roses Latin League

Ricky/Natalie 146
Zoe/James 145
Ali/Brian 139
Natalie/Vincent 123
Ricky/Erin 109
Jade/Ian 98
Chris/Ola 97
Phil/Katya 91
Laila/Anton 80
Craig/Flavia 75
Joe/Kristina 71
Lynda/Darren 68
Jo/Brendan 67
Martina/Matthew 59
Rav/Aliona 57
Richard/Lilia 39

October 28, 2009

The Strictly Sweep – Week 6 and a midweek update

Again apologies for the tardyness. The celebrating of the heroic comeback on Sunday clearly took its toll, but of course that’s no excuse for keeping you out of the loop. As it’s Wednesday already, I shall combine the league tables with the midweek update again, but I promise things will be back to normal next week!!

We’ve reached the end of the first stage of the competition, having run through the full range of dances now, finishing up with either an American Smooth or a Samba. Something significant came out of this week – in spite of a conversation I had with one of you regarding Ricky W & Natalie, it definitely won’t be ‘easy money’ regarding the prospects for their victory, as Ali & Brian proved that they are a force to be reckoned with, coming up with an almost flawless American Smooth which got three nines and a 10 from Judge Bruno, resulting in the highest score of the series thus far, while Ricky W & Natalie, although getting a reasonable score of 32 for their Samba, were once again bumped from the top of the leaderboard. We can see that the majority of couples are steadily improving, with one or two exceptions; both Laila & Anton and Chris & Ola had safe and secure comeback weeks, Laila getting over her latin difficulties with an unspectacular disco based Samba, and Chris able to get through a dance for the first time possibly since week one without making a mistake, eliciting a “Yeah Baby!” from Ola. We also do not have the prospect of Head Judge Len doing the Lambada with Judge Craig to look forward to, after Zoe & James were kept out of the dance off. Of course, we can’t not pass some comment on Jo & Brendan’s Samba, if you can call it that. All power to Jo for coming on Strictly when she had never done any kind of public performing before, especially given her very public difficulties, but you need to put more effort in. Still, it matters not, because as we know, Jo & Brendan ended up in the dance off against Jade & Ian and, as with last week, there really wasn’t going to be any doubt as to the outcome. So Jade & Ian survive, while if you had Jo & Brendan, you’re done with the sweep.

Moving on to the leagues, and it’s all change at the top of the main table, with a high scoring week for Jade & Ian seeing them surge to the top, a single point clear of Ricky W & Natalie, while Ali & Brian close the gap in third place; three points now seperate the top three, suggesting again that there’s no such thing as ‘easy money’. In the ballroom league, Laila & Anton retain top spot with a five point advantage over Ali & Brian, thanks to Anton’s show dance this week to the vocals of Harry Connick Jr, with Jade & Ian a further three points back in third, while in the latin league we could potentially be looking at ‘easy chocolate’, as Ricky W & Natalie have stormed 38 points clear of second placed Zoe & James, with Ali & Brian in third. Is this title wrapped up, and should we start paying out now? Well, given that Ricky W & Natalie were the last name called out as safe, then no. You never know the way the public will go, and with there being fewer useless dancers left in the competition, the need to stay out of the dance off will now grow that much more.

We’re done with the either/or scenario now – each week the remaining couples will pick a dance that they have yet to do. This will see some come into their own, some real shockers, and more excitement than can be generated by a pair of spiky-haired twins from Dublin.

Dancers Points
Jade/Ian 381
Ricky/Natalie 380
Ali/Brian 378
Zoe/James 353
Phil/Katya 334
Laila/Anton 331
Natalie/Vincent 322
Ricky/Erin 317
Chris/Ola 313
Craig/Flavia 273
Jo/Brendan 263
Lynda/Darren 216
Joe/Kristina 189
Rav/Aliona 162
Martina/Matthew 125
Richard/Lilia 115

For the ballroom and latin leagues, the tables look like this:
Celebrations Ballroom League

Laila/Anton 114
Ali/Brian 109
Jade/Ian 106
Zoe/James 101
Natalie/Vincent 100
Ricky/Erin 98
Phil/Katya 95
Craig/Flavia 87
Ricky/Natalie 84
Chris/Ola 82
Jo/Brendan 76
Lynda/Darren 55
Rav/Aliona 49
Joe/Kristina 46
Martina/Matthew 32
Richard/Lilia 29

Roses Latin League

Ricky/Natalie 146
Zoe/James 108
Ali/Brian 101
Jade/Ian 98
Chris/Ola 92
Phil/Katya 91
Natalie/Vincent 88
Ricky/Erin 85
Laila/Anton 80
Craig/Flavia 70
Jo/Brendan 67
Joe/Kristina 66
Lynda/Darren 63
Martina/Matthew 49
Rav/Aliona 47
Richard/Lilia 34

The Jacksons Return
No, sorry. He’s still dead, so we won’t see the King of Pop and his brothers perform on a live show. In fact, it’s the return of the Jackson family to Walford, with the announcement that Natalie Cassidy, along with Lindsey Coulson and that heartbreaker Dean Gaffney are to return to Eastenders next year as Sonia, her mum Carol and brother Robbie ahead of the show’s 25th anniversary.
“EastEnders’ Jacksons to reunite”

Those regulars we forget
There’s a load of people we all think of when we think of Strictly – Brucie and Tess, the judges, the professionals and Claudia Winkleman presenting It Takes Two (with her fabulous shoes). But, there is always someone else mentioned that I’m sure people won’t think of. So who exactly is Dave Arch? Well, his work doesn’t revolve solely around Strictly obviously. His main focus is in the recording studio both as a musician and as a conductor and arranger, where he was worked with (amongst others) Leona Lewis and Il Divo, as well as on various film scores. In addition, he has played on stage with Paul McCartney, and does music work for TV. On top of which he is responsible for the Strictly orchestra, and arranging all of the music for each performance, according to the needs of the professional’s choice; apparently, Brendan likes his music up tempo, while Anton prefers it a bit slower. Not only that, but he also has to edit each piece to ensure that it runs for just ninety seconds (the duration of a Strictly dance), he has to pitch it to accomodate the voices of his singers, and, for the latin numbers, transcribe the lyrics phonetically as only one of the singers can speak Spanish. And you thought training to do the dancing was hard!!
Dave Arch Interview
Strictly’s backstage secrets

Kat deals with the moaning Cat
Protests abound from the female population about Katya’s treatment of Phil in the training room. He tweeted that Katya had resorted to throwing pens at him (amongst other things) in an effort to get him to work, which has led Phil’s fans to send messages to Katya telling her to stop. Of course, there’s more to it – Katya’s hardline regime of stationary abuse comes from advice from Phil’s wife, who has apparently told her not to take any crap from Phil. It seems to be working, as they are quietly improving week on week and, if the public stay on side, could well be dark horses. But, Katya is not simply a hard task mistress (let’s face it, she’s no Miss Whiplash); she has also turned their training room into a cricket field, giving Phil a frame of reference for their steps:
“Now we sashay down to third man and shimmy to the fielding position.”

“Strictly Come Dancing fans get protective over Phil Tufnell”

Get Craig to Blackpool
In two weeks, Strictly will be broadcast live from the Tower Ballroom in Blackpool, the home of ballroom dancing, for the first time since Jill Halfpenny & Darren Bennett did their famous perfect Jive in the final of Series Two. And no one is more excited about it than Craig, who was born and raised there. Unfortunately, despite both his and Flavia’s best efforts, he isn’t very good. However, knowing the public as we do, the possibility is entirely there that they will vote in droves each week so that Craig can achieve his dream of stepping out on the famous floor in the Blackpool Tower, as evidenced by his second bottom Samba, yet going straight through (of course, the irony is that he most likely would have survived the dance off against Jo because, as bad as he is, Jo was that much worse). Of course, the public can be equally cruel, and the possibility arises that he will be voted off next week. We’ll see.
“Kelly not deterred by Strictly criticism”

Classic Strictly
Classic Strictly this week shows that it doesn’t matter what age you are if you have talent. Cherie Lunghi partnered James Jordan last year, and they had the highest score in their first performance, a Foxtrot. For their second, they did the most difficult of latin dances to get right, the Rumba. And what a performance; for a celebrity in just her second competitive dance, it was a masterly show of grace and elegance that wowed the judges and the audience, and garnered a score of 35. So, from Series Six, Cherie and James dance the Rumba.

October 23, 2009

An apology

It has been pointed out to be by one of you that the prevalence of Rickys in this year’s competition has led to some confusion on my part. To quote directly:

I hate to point this out – but you’re getting your Rickys mixed up! – Ricky G is the clowning about one from Eastenders dancing with Erin, and Ricky W is the lovely piece of man-candy from Hollyoaks!

Sincere apologies for any confusion caused – it’s Ricky W that is top of the league and has received the first 10 of the series, not Ricky G.

October 22, 2009

The Strictly Sweep – Week 5 and a Midweek Update

I do apologise for being so tardy with this week’s update everybody, but this was due to circumstances beyond my control – I won’t go into the gory details except to say there was a pounding headache and some degree of regurgitation involved. But, we’re back with the league tables, which I’ll combine with a brief update from the world of Strictly.

So, Viennese Waltz and Jive then. Some Viennese Waltzes were good, and some were VERY good. And as for the Jives? Not so good, to the downright god awful (Laila & Anton, we’re looking at you). Normal service was resumed with Ricky G & Natalie back once again at the top of the judge’s leaderboard with the highest score of the series so far, 36, including the first 10, rather predictably from Judge Alesha. On the flip side was Laila & Anton and their Jive, which the girl went into with no confidence whatsoever. Is it any wonder she got it so drastically wrong?? Not really. There were some pretty poor Jives all around, with even Ali & Brian scoring under 30 for the first time. The best of them no doubt was Zoe & James, so imagine the shock when they ended up in the bottom two and having to face the dance-off. Imagine the even greater shock that they were up against Joe & Kristina; seemingly the whole of Wales wasn’t on his side. In all fairness, it wasn’t really much of a contest as to who would go through on the Judge’s decision, as Zoe is clearly very good at this, and frankly, Joe isn’t. So it was, a unanimous decision that Zoe & James went through, and Joe & Kristina went out. So, I fear, your time is up for the sweep if you had the Welsh Dragon and his Siberian Siren.

As regards the leagues, Ricky G & Natalie remain out in front, ten points clear of their nearest rivals Ali & Brian, the only two to have made it over 300 points thus far, with Jade & Ian’s exceptional scoring this week seeing them jump two places into third. In the Ballroom league, Laila & Anton’s strong showing in their Foxtrot has meant that they have retained top spot this week, though with a markedly reduced advantage over the second place team of Jade & Ian; likewise, Ricky & Natalie stay top of the Latin table with a six point cushion over Zoe & James. In terms of the minor competitions, Ricky G & Natalie have a 2.6 point advantage over Zoe & James in the highest average score stake, they have the highest weekly score thanks to their 36 this week, and they have also kicked off the Total Ten standings with their maximum from Judge Alesha.

This coming week the couples will attempt an American Smooth or a Samba. Everyone knows Samba is the party dance, but it isn’t usually so much of a party for the celebrities, while American Smooth sees them having to get to grips with lifts. Should be interesting.

Dancers Points
Ricky/Natalie 313
Ali/Brian 303
Jade/Ian 295
Zoe/James 284
Phil/Katya 277
Laila/Anton 270
Natalie/Vincent 264
Ricky/Erin 254
Chris/Ola 252
Craig/Flavia 224
Jo/Brendan 220
Lynda/Darren 201
Joe/Kristina 164
Rav/Aliona 157
Martina/Matthew 120
Richard/Lilia 100

For the ballroom and latin leagues, the tables look like this:
Celebrations Ballroom League

Laila/Anton 109
Jade/Ian 106
Phil/Katya 95
Craig/Flavia 87
Ricky/Natalie 84
Jo/Brendan 76
Ali/Brian 72
Natalie/Vincent 71
Zoe/James 68
Ricky/Erin 64
Lynda/Darren 55
Chris/Ola 54
Rav/Aliona 49
Joe/Kristina 46
Martina/Matthew 32
Richard/Lilia 29

Roses Latin League

Ricky/Natalie 109
Zoe/James 103
Ali/Brian 96
Natalie/Vincent 88
Chris/Ola 87
Ricky/Erin 85
Phil/Katya 61
Jade/Ian 61
Joe/Kristina 61
Lynda/Darren 58
Laila/Anton 52
Jo/Brendan 48
Craig/Flavia 47
Martina/Matthew 44
Rav/Aliona 42
Richard/Lilia 29

World Champions and their Daddies
After the Dancing Pig fiasco of last year, everyone was hoping that we’d see the worst dancers eventually end up in the dance-off. In fairness, Judge Craig never did himself any favours by perhaps being overly harsh on some celebrities in previous years, thus eliciting the sympathy of the public (“oh isn’t he nasty”). So it thus appeared with Joe the Welsh Dragon; it’s always a bit iffy to recruit a sporting hero, especially one who has such a following from a part of the Union that isn’t England (the Celts do get quite protective of their sporting heroes, even more so when they’re an undefeated Super-Middleweight Champion of the World). So we were faced with the prospect of the whole of Wales voting to keep Joe in the competition. Fortunately (for the competition) that hasn’t happened. And yet (“oh he’s such a nasty man”), we had the prospect, prior to Saturday, of the big bully Judge Craig having to face the irate father; Enzo Calzaghe felt the need to stand up for his boy and threaten to give our caustic choreographer (see the alliteration there?) a good thumping. Yet I can’t help wonder why the chap felt the need to stick up for Joe. Are undeafeated world champion boxers incapable of fighting their own battles?

I know the feeling
Lynda has had a much better time of it since leaving the competition in one particular area of her life – keeping her sheets clean. The woman is apparently an obsessive about keeping her bedclothes clean, which she found somewhat difficult during her time on Strictly due to the amount of fake tan they apply, which left her sheets brown. I can relate.

Well, would you rather watch dancing, or men talking about rain?
Do you have an opinion on the BBC’s foul-up? As we all know, São Paulo is three hours behind London (did we all know? I had to look on Wikipedia), so qualifying for the Brazilian Grand Prix was in in the early evening our time. As we may also well know, it has a tendency to rain a bit in Brazil. And so it was on Saturday, with qualifying continually interupted due to the rain. The BBC had scheduled its coverage just before Strictly, but decided to stick with it on BBC1 even when there were no cars on the circuit. Thus it was that we apparently had the joy of watching Jake Humphrey, David Coulthard and Eddie Jordan standing around for half an hour talking about the Brazilian weather waiting for something to happen, leading to Strictly starting late. Needless to say, the hardcore were not best pleased:

What were the BBC thinking delaying Strictlyto give us the thrilling viewing of three men talking about Brazilian rain? No driving going on just rabbiting about trivial weather…I watched enough rain fall in our dismal summer then a ray of light returns with the start of Strictly and it’s delayed for what??????

Of course, we all know it turned out alright in the end. Well done Jenson!!

Philistines win out again
So it looks like X-Factor is winning the ratings battle, and has led to the BBC giving in and rescheduling Strictly for earlier in the evening. Of course, the BBC won’t admit that’s why they’re moving it; apparently it is because Jon Culshaw has a show that needs to be fitted in. Yeah right. The BBC has gotten a bloody nose from its ‘agressive scheduling’ of Strictly up against X-Factor this year, so with any luck moving it back to before 7.00pm will see the ratings return to something like they were in previous years.

Classic Strictly
Back to the good stuff this week, although we keep the controversy theme. The early weeks of Series 5 had shown that Kelly Brook was going to be a contender. Unfortunately, the death of her father midway through the competition meant we never got to see how far she could have gone. But, in Week 4 she and Brendan performed the famous and controversial three lift American Smooth. Judge Craig, Judge Arlene and Head Judge Len all said it would have been virtually a perfect routine except for the third lift, and had to mark them down. But, excitable as ever, Judge Bruno got out his big paddle and presented them with a ten. Of course, the controversy doesn’t detract from a brilliant performance. From Series 5, Kelly & Brendan dance the American Smooth.

October 14, 2009

Midweek Update

I won’t go into this any further, but I felt it important to comment on the Anton furore. I haven’t written it directly on here, as my intention with this blog is to maintain my role as a neutral, so I’ve put it on my own personal blog.

Anton – A Personal View

With that said, on with the update.

The Nightmare of Brucie
You may have heard, assuming you didn’t see (and if not why not!!??) that Amy Winehouse appeared on last weekend’s show performing backing vocals for her Goddaughter. It seems that Miss Wino…er Winehouse, had had nightmares about Brucie for ages, and it was all thanks to Bedknobs and Broomsticks. Because Brucie made an appearence in that Disney classic as a sinister spiv who worked for the dastardly Bookman, which obviously affected the young Amy terribly. Er…OK. Bruce Forsyth as the stuff of nightmares. Make your own minds up.

Tess the entrepreneuse
Speaking of our hosts, Tess has come up twice this week. First, she has applied to have “Tess Daly” made into a trademark, as she’s launching her own range of cosmetics, which I guess means every time I type her name here I’ll have to pay her 5p. I think from now on we’ll refer to Brucie’s co-host as “Fred”, or it’ll cost me a fortune!! “Fred’s” other newsworthy item came when it was announced that Tess had been signed up as the new face of La Senza, mere months after giving birth for the second time. Nice work if you can get it. Nice…well, let’s not make any more comment about what is nice about “Fred” shall we?

Ola, put some clothes on!!
Should we feel sorry for Chris, having to dance with Ola every day? Should we have any sympathy for him getting so distracted by all the lovely things she almost wears on the dancefloor? It’s fair to say that Ola is noted for her skimpy outfits, so Chris should have come into the thing with his eyes wide open. In all fairness, he probably has got his eyes wide open, as have the majority of those who have a Y Chromosome.

ola and chris

Classic Strictly
From the good to the bad this week. Who can forget the star of last year’s competition? No, not the eventual champion, or those that got multiple perfect scores. No, the star of last year, for better or worse, was the ‘Dancing Pig’, former BBC political editor John Sergeant, parterned by the Siberian Siren Kristina. Perhaps the ultimate moment from last year’s Strictly, and one that will go down in its annals, right up there with Christopher Parker’s ‘Batman’ from series one, is their Paso Doble. This caused possibly the greatest comment from the judges ever, when Judge Craig announced that this performance had “brought marching to a whole new level”. For your viewing pleasure, from Series Six, we present John & Kristina’s Paso Doble.

October 12, 2009

The Strictly Sweep – Week 4

Week 4 everyone, and after furore it’s back to the foxtrot. Well actually, the foxtrot and the salsa, with the remaining couples attempting the most technical of the ballroom or the least technical of the latin dances. For once, Ricky G & Natalie did not come top with the judges, with that spot occupied by Laila & Anton’s sublime foxtrot and its score of 34. There was also the continuing Jo & Joe Show, with possibly the least accomplished dancers left still finishing bottom of the leaderboard, and still avoiding the dance-off. Thus it was left to Lynda & Darren to face off with Craig & Flavia, a second bottom two finish for each, and another split decision leaving Head Judge Len with the casting vote. He went for Craig & Flavia, so our Corrie boy lives to fight another day in his ongoing war with his nerves, while Lynda & Darren fall by the wayside. So, I’m afraid that if you had Lynda & Darren in the sweep, you’re done.

As far as the league goes, Ricky G & Natalie remain out in front, 9 points clear of Ali & Brian, while Zoe & James have a further 10 point gap to make up in third. As you can see, the table is starting to open up, with the top two making an early break for it. We’ll see if those behind can catch up as the competition goes on. In the Ballroom league, Laila & Anton have a massive 27 point cushion over second place Craig & Flavia, while Ricky G & Natalie hold a 16 point advantage over Natalie & Vincent in the Latin league. However, at the monet, these standings are somewhat skewed, as the couples that occupy the top two spots in each table have each have a ration of 3:1 in favour of the dances they’ve done; this will even itself out over the coming weeks.

As regards the other competitions, Ricky G & Natalie have the highest average score so far, with an impressive 33, 1.75 points ahead of Zoe & James, while their 35 in Week 3 remains the highest score of the series so far.

Next week will see couples attempt either a Viennese Waltz or a Jive. Should be interesting.

Dancers Points
Ricky/Natalie 238
Ali/Brian 229
Zoe/James 219
Laila/Anton 217
Jade/Ian 213
Phil/Katya 211
Natalie/Vincent 203
Chris/Ola 199
Ricky/Erin 196
Lynda/Darren 176
Craig/Flavia 175
Jo/Brendan 170
Rav/Aliona 152
Martina/Matthew 115
Joe/Kristina 114
Richard/Lilia 95

For the ballroom and latin leagues, the tables look like this:
Celebrations Ballroom League

Laila/Anton 109
Craig/Flavia 82
Ali/Brian 72
Jade/Ian 71
Zoe/James 68
Ricky/Erin 64
Phil/Katya 63
Lynda/Darren 55
Chris/Ola 54
Rav/Aliona 49
Jo/Brendan 48
Ricky/Natalie 48
Joe/Kristina 46
Natalie/Vincent 39
Martina/Matthew 32
Richard/Lilia 29

Roses Latin League

Ricky/Natalie 104
Natalie/Vincent 88
Zoe/James 68
Ali/Brian 62
Chris/Ola 60
Phil/Katya 56
Jade/Ian 56
Ricky/Erin 55
Lynda/Darren 53
Jo/Brendan 43
Martina/Matthew 39
Rav/Aliona 37
Joe/Kristina 35
Craig/Flavia 27
Laila/Anton 25
Richard/Lilia 24

October 8, 2009

AHHHHHHH!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!

I’ve just seen the reigning champion walking past me in the hospital!! Played it cool until he and his wife walked passed, but then I became all “OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!!!”

October 7, 2009

Midweek Update

It’s been quite eventful hasn’t it? The furore over Judge Alesha seems to be dying down, to be replaced by another, seperate furore that is much more serious. You’ll have all heard by now that, some weeks ago, Anton, seeing Laila with a fake tan, said that she looked like a…well, I won’t use the actual word here, but suffice it to say that complete and utter twonks use it to describe people from Pakistan. It’s bad enough that Anton used this term, but Laila is of both Moroccan and Indian ancestry. Anton, you royal pillock!! The producers are standing by him, because he has apologised profusely to Laila, who has said that she’s accepted it, and they’re getting on with trying to win Strictly – from the footage that is on the main show and It Takes Two, they seem to be OK. Of course, the media will continue to run with the story until they find something else to latch on to. But for God’s sake man, think before you open your gob!!

I’m in the mood for dancing…romancing
What is it about Strictly? Is it the getting close in various romantic and sensual ways? Not only do we have the (albeit alleged) fling going on between Joe and Kristina, but we also have the prospect of Ali and Brian getting closer. Brian has come out and said that he’s been asking Ali out for weeks, while now Ali has also said that there is something there:

“I think he is lovely. I think because we are working so closely together, you do get interested. You spend so much time together and I really am enjoying the moment. I feel great.”

What with the whole Matt and Flavia thing back in Series 5 (couldn’t help noticing him in the audience last week), and the (again alleged) thing between Natasha and Brendan way back in Series 1, has the Strictly romantic effect struck again?

“Strictly Come Dancing: Ali Bastian admits her true feelings for Brian Fortuna”

“I’m having the Time Of My Life admits Ali Bastian as she recreates Dirty Dancing with Brian Fortuna”

alibrian

Too high high, hush hush ai do ai
Former Judge Arlene has come out and said that the scores in the first few weeks are too generous (could that ever be said of Judge Craig?). Apparently, she has been marking the dancers herself, and the marks she’s been giving are nowhere near as high as those being given by the judges. As it happens, she says that Craig is the only one marking what he’s actually seeing:

“I’ve done an overall mark for everybody, and theirs are nowhere near where mine are. I think Craig is the only one marking what he sees, and he gets booed.”

This is true, as Judge Craig usually gives consistently lower marks than either Head Judge Len or Judge Bruno. However, invariably the comments and criticism he gives, most of which is constructive, mirror the mark he gives out, and Arlene was invariably similar to that with her marks and her comments. Should we be seeing so many scores over 30 in the first three weeks? Perhaps the acid test will be once the tens start coming; last year there were a total of 59, with the first coming in week 7. Anyone fancy a wager that there’ll be more than that?

Kat and the Cat
Katya is one of the three new girls this year, and she is usually known (not unsurprisingly) as Kat. Is it a coincidence that her partner is Phil ‘The Cat’ Tufnell? Probably not. It’s fair to say that Kat (not ‘The Cat’; actually, I think we’ll stick with Phil and Katya, because that’s just much easier) has her work cut out because it’s well known that Phil doesn’t take things all that seriously – his nickname comes not from his catlike reflexes while fielding, which has been described as ‘ordinary’, which can be taken as a euphamism for ‘rubbish’, but from his habit of falling asleep in the dressing room. However, Katya seems to have awakened some apparently dormant talent for dance, given Phil’s apparently effortless Quickstep. This is all the more impressive having heard that he was dancing on a torn cartlidge in his right knee, which he had surgery on the following day. Could we see a third cricketer lift the Glitterball trophy this year?

It’s Strictly, but sanitised
G.O.L.D. is showing Dancing with the Stars, the American version of Strictly. I watched it last week, which saw the female celebrities attempting either a Viennese Waltz or a Salsa. Or at least, they said it was a Viennese Waltz. Head Judge Len (who also heads up the judges in the US) called it an ‘American Style Viennese Waltz’, as there wasn’t much in the way of rotation, or statying in hold for that matter. On the flip side of that, Kelly Osborne (yes, Ozzy and Sharon’s daughter) did it well, scoring 23/30, thus proving that she can be elegant and graceful. That being said, there’s just too much hooping and hollaring from the audience to really enjoy it; they’re on their feet after every dance for heaven’s sake. As for Tom Bergeron (the American Brucie), well, he’s no Brucie. For all his naff jokes, Brucie is a born entertainer who knows how to work an audience. Not only that, but he’s also a dancer. There’s a lot to be said for having someone who at least knows something of what they’re talking about as the host. Suffice it to say, there will be no more Dancing with the Stars on my TV screen. I shall be sticking with the Original and Best.

I always did like Len
I’ve always liked Head Judge Len, and now I know the reason why. The man is a 100%, cast iron…Iron!! That’s right folks; my beloved West Ham is also his beloved West Ham. Born in Bethnal Green, his mum would only let him go to Upton Park when he was just a nipper, as it was one bus ride away from his house. God help the both of us!!

“It’s strictly West Ham for Len Goodman”

Classic Strictly
A latin for Classic Strictly this week, featuring Judge Alesha from her time as a competitor. Series 5 was on a knife edge as it drew towards the final. Week 8 saw a couple of storming performances; Matt & Flavia with the Salsa, which scored a 38 from the judges looked to have it, until Alesha & Matthew came out with their Cha Cha Cha, to Beyonce’s ‘Crazy in Love’. Alesha may have received criticism for her judging, but no one can criticise her for how she dances. From 2007, this is Alesha & Matthew’s Cha Cha Cha.